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Aug 27, 2023Liked by David Lat

Thanks for this—I needed the laughs:

"Does anyone actually LIKE Subway? They claim to make their sandwiches with love, but some meat would actually be nice. So I’m no Subway fan—but apparently others are, which is how the world’s largest purveyor of farting bread managed to sell itself for $9.6 billion (an impressive sum, although less than the $10 billion that Subway’s founding families sought when they started seeking a sale back in February).

The buyer is Roark Capital, an Atlanta-based private-equity group with extensive investments in fast 'food.' Roark hopes to create synergy by merging Subway with two of its other portfolio brands, Auntie Anne’s and Cinnabon, and having the awful aromas neutralize each other.

If you, like me, get a kick when lowbrow brands hire highbrow law firms, then you’ll be amused to see that Subway was represented by Sullivan & Cromwell, with the S&C team led by two top deal lawyers, Frank Aquila and Melissa Sawyer. Meanwhile, Roark turned to the august team of Jeffrey Marell and Sarah Stasny at Paul, Weiss, now a major player in the world of big-ticket M&A. Hopefully the commemorative 'deal toys' won’t be shaped like 'footlong' subs that are only 11 inches in length."

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